An optimistic girl in search of her happiness. Learning life lessons as she grows, she found secret little recipes shared by wonderful people whom she met who teaches her recipes to a happy life. And here she is, sharing this recipes hoping this recipes can also bring happiness to other's life.

bolditalicunderlinestrikeout

I know many of you have hard time looking for me these past few weeks.
Grandpapa has been sick all this while, after coming back, I felt I should be here by him to serve him at least before I realize that time cannot be reversed.
As time passes, his body got weaker, unable to withstand the cancer cells that are spreading within him.
I made a call to bring grandpapa back to Linggi (our hometown).
Something that all of us should bear in mind : they prefer to "leave" from their own house
Especially for a patient like my grandpapa, who was unable to walk, unable to talk, unable to move and unable to eat, whose eyes could barely open, who seems like he is just waiting for his time to come, didnt make him any happier staying in our house in the city.



We drove him back, an hour trip, we stopped by the old house where he spent most of his life there.
The house where my aunts and uncles were born, and the very house where I was raised too.



24/11 was the day I thought we could all celebrate his birthday together.
Unfortunately, grandpapa did not make it till that day.
He left us on 19/11 at 5.46pm peacefully.
The tradition needs us to pray for 49days, for every 7th day of the week.
Grandmama I believe whose emotion is not stable at all, needs company.
Therefore, we as the grandchildren took turns to stay by her side.
If anyone of you are wondering what am I doing deep in the jungle, let me answer your curiosity.

1. I pray.
2. I eat.
3. I sleep.
4. I read.
5. I reflect everyday.
6. I did housework. (I know, its a miracle)
7. I tried to discipline myself.
8. I meditate.

When you have your emotions stirred up, I believe you will find ways to keep it cool.
For me, grandpapa's death have taught me great lessons, and also a stepping stone to maturity.
Such as :

1. Our life are all determined by only a piece of paper.
Why?
When we are born : Birth Cert
When we study : Student Cert
When we graduate : Degree/Diploma etc Cert
When we marry : Marriage Cert
IF we divorce : Divorce Cert
And when we die : Death Cert
All that was left upon my grandpapa's death, was a piece of Death Cert that we took from the state office.

2. Appreciate your loved ones while they are still alive
I remember vividly, how we have to clean our grandpapa's body after the 8th hour of his departure.
The undertakers have him dressed up nicely, but instead of having them doing the job, his children and his eldest granddaughter (me) wanted to have him dressed ourselves.
My dad saw how I was trying to fix his gloves, making sure his fingers are put nicely.
That very morning, around 3am, he said :

Dad : I am very proud how you tried to make sure everything went well. And you dressed ah gong nicely.

Me : (silent)

Dad : But, dont only do it at the last minute. If you want to do, start doing now. Dont wait till after people pass away only you try to make sure things are nicely done. Do what you can nicely for the rest, especially ah ma before you miss this chance.

Me : trying to.

This is very true and if you are holding grudges or hating your parents(especially), friends, relatives or etc, think again.
Especially parents, most of them might have reached 50 years old, or even more.
Give it a thought. How much more time do they have left to be by you? How long more can they nag at you? It wont be long.
Therefore, if you think you are not loving them enough, start by giving a little more concern to them, spend more time talking and listening to them.
Because for every words they said to you, every tears they shed for you, it expresses their unconditional love for you.
If you wish to have a rebellious kid, be rebellious to your parents. If not, do it otherwise.

I made believe that grandpapa has left and he is heading to the Pure Land right now.
Though it is hard to accept that he is no longer here with us, his beautiful memories still live on within each of us.-
-Rest in Peace-

Recipe : “To understand your parents' love you must raise children yourself.”
"All happy families resemble each other, each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.-Leo Tolstoy <